Dating & Relationships

What To Do After A Break Up

what to do after a break up

A break up can be rough. For the very reason that you shared a lot of time with someone and developed a relationship together. When that relationship ends your life changes drastically. Whether you were with the girl for 5 months or 5 years it takes will power to move on.

Now the best advice is usually the hardest to follow. Many are not going to be able to follow these simple rules just because they may not be emotionally stable at the moment (or in general). Your head is in the clouds fresh out of a relationship and irrational thoughts occur.

However I am here to explain a powerful tool in a mans arsenal that will help the chances for a girl to come back after she leaves you.

Before I help you with what to do exactly I am going to say this first very slowly.



If you have a terrible case of oneitis and feel this is the only girl for you, let me be the first to tell you… you are wrong. There are plenty of fish in the sea. I know cliché but true. You need to cure your oneitis as soon as possible and learn to live the effortless alpha lifestyle.  She is not “the one”.

Now that I got that out-of-the-way let me tell you what to do after a break up. Disappear.

Ignore her and do not contact her for at least 3 months. I would make it more like 4-8 months. No texting, calling, emailing, or Facebook and Instagram liking or commenting. Go away once she breaks the news.

I am a firm believer to not burn bridges and still don’t, although once she decides to kick you to the curb it’s your time to vanish.


Now this will be the opposite of what you will want to do. You might want to text her and say that very last thing that you think will change her mind. You might want to call her and tell her how much you are sorry. Basically try to contact her to get her back. Sorry to tell you but that will not work. Even if you were unhappy with the relationship you will still try anything to get her back. It’s a part of human nature. We all want what we can’t have even though we may not have really wanted it to begin with.

The issue with professing your love after she dumps you is that it will turn her off even more. As you continue to be needy and pathetic her attraction will decrease further and further. The more contact the LOWER her attraction will go and once it reaches rock bottom there is little to no hope for a rekindle. If you ever want to have sex with your new ex lover again cease contact.

what to do after a break up


The no contact rule usually works and if it doesn’t… so what? It doesn’t matter. You already are moving on to the next girl. For the most part, women return after months of no contact. If you were not a crazy guy or did not showcase extreme beta male neediness then it is likely they will come back. Either out of curiosity, for sex or another try at the relationship.

Now this may not include the girls who got married, moved far away or turned lesbian, although some girls switch teams very often. The disappearing act will cause the curiosity from the girl because most guys don’t do it. Most men burn the bridge, contact excessive or turn beta and want to buy gifts such as flowers, which never work.

So when she breaks up with you, go away, anywhere from 3-8 months. This technique has worked often in my revolving door of success with women. Now during this time you can do a number of things: become a better version of yourself, date lots of other women, have sex with other women, learn from the experience.

DO NOT WAIT TO HERE FROM HER! The reason she left is because there was something wrong with the relationship and if you did get back together those issues will most likely come up again. This is how to create a revolving door of women and possibly have sex with her again. Getting back into a new relationship with the same girl is not something I would recommend.

What to do after the no contact period

Social media is a great tool to keep tabs on her. Not stalk her but check in to see if she is in a relationship after the no contact period. If she has a new boyfriend then stay away for an extra 3 months. Check back again if you remember her at this point. Contacting her if she has a new boyfriend is pointless. A big waste of time. Let her new relationship run its course and let her try to be happy.

If she is single or no boyfriend in sight send her a text like “hey how have you been?” Or “I just seen a girl in this movie that looked like you… how is it going?” Also a funny gif with a text saying “hey, whats going on?” Send at your discretion as long as it is casual, non needy and with a care free attitude. Even through text, women can sense neediness.

Do not compliment her at all. I don’t recommend a compliment until a woman earns it. You should be independent from any outcome and not give a fuck. Even if you have to pretend to not care although you shouldn’t care anyway because you have other women that you are dating at the moment.


The ideal situation is for her to contact you FIRST. There were times I never intended to contact a girl back after a break up but she contact me first and I ended up having sex with her again. If she contacts you before the no contact period ends, it is ok to respond. If she is contacting you about her boots she left at your house then handle the situation and reset the no contact time clock back to-day one. If she wants to see how you are doing, bored, or just wants to talk then get her to hang out with you in person as soon as possible. Again in a non needy, freedom of outcome type way. If she refuses to hang out at the moment or in the future continue with no contact again.

You don’t want to waste your time with an old flame when you have other girls waiting to hang out with you. She will come around sooner or later and if she doesn’t… who cares. I might sound harsh to some but if a woman doesn’t appreciate your value then she is not right for you anyway.

what to do after a break up


Now NOT listening to my advice will only push her further away into a black hole where she will vanish. If you made any of the following mistakes such as degrading her, crazy acts of jealousy, excessive contacting, crying and pleading to take you back, abuse to her or friends, and social media blitz of focus to the relationship then your chances shrunk for her to come back.

Once attraction drops it is hard for it to return. Although it is not to say that she won’t come back. Advice I can give you is to start the no contact as soon as possible. If you did make mistakes work on yourself for the time being. Come back a new and improved person or just continue with the program and go on to the next girl.





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